I’m disappointed that my husband is still not awake yet. Literally and mentally. He’s still sleeping. I don’t think he understands what it is to be a parent. It’s not just about changing their diapers and bagi makan and send them to school. It’s also about giving them a sense of security, teach them life skills, set good examples (like wake up early, pray, and all that). It’s sad that we’re having a fifth kid and he’s still not realising it. And if I want to talk about current situation, he’s like, “What’s wrong with it?”
I am a bit concerned. I am feeling a bit lost. As to, nak buat apa. For the company. This RMO is really making me be really laid-back, to the point yang I’m not doing anything about the company.
This is awesome.
What is my business goal? What is my expectation from BNI? Right now I feel bothered by the things I have to do for BNI, because I didn’t set any expectations. Well, there is. I mean, I didn’t expect to get business from it, just to network. And because of that expectation, I feel like banyak effort to put in just to network.
I’m at this feeling where I don’t want to do anything. Like, work-wise. Career-wise. I just want to stay where I am. Aku malas nak cari client baru, malas nak think of our “systems”, what services we offer, nak update company profile, 121 sheet, nak 121 or whatever.
I finished the proposal. I feel a bit awkward sending it today, but I think that was proposal was good. Great. To be used as template. It’s something I’m extremely satisfied with. Like it’s better than the ones before. Of course it will be updated along the way, but this version, I feel it’s ready. I think it’s better explained.
I don’t want to do it.
I don’t want to do proposals. I don’t want to meet clients. I don’t want to do invoices. I don’t want to do any of the work.
I have a confusion. A confused mind, about work. And money. I have a goal, which is money oriented, not work oriented. I want more money for myself, more income, but not necessarily from the business. I goal is to increase my income, not my expand business.