Dream Day 12

We moved somewhere, tapi rumah lama. I got my own room at the end of the second floor. Bigger. Then I have 2 other younger siblings, one boy & one girl. Their rooms are side by side. We lepak in the boy’s room looking out the road and saw a girl in japanese school uniform mcm tak puas hati pandang kitorg

But I’m sort of like the outsider.

Then somehow I’m in the kitchen and I needed to use it for something tapi aku kena marah. There was a spill on the floor. Like caramel sugar syrup buat candy tu.

I made a violin out of it. But it was heavy and I needed to do something else, I left it for a while (reluctantly, but had to because I didn’t have a choice or help) outside an entrance of a place. When I came back, it was gone.

I felt useless. Like I can’t do anything right. Worried. Tried to look for it in a covered parking lot (like at the mall) but couldn’t find it. Parking area tu x byk kereta pun.

Then I found a miniature something. A car or a violin, can’t remember.

I feel small. And I tried to make something big and grand and proud of, then I lost it. I didn’t take care good enough of it? Or is it because I feel small, I feel like I shouldn’t or can’t have it, and therefore, I intentionally lost it. 

But you know, you did do something you’re proud of. And you’re great because of that. You did that to impress somebody else when you should’ve been impressed with yourself. Own it, girl. You did it. Stop trying to give credit or share with someone else. Stop putting yourself out of the limelight. Own it. You did it. You’re proud of it. Yeah, maybe someone else helped you with it. It may not be 100% your own work, but you definitely put your 100% into it. And that MATTERS! Your 100% matters! You did it! You made that violin out of sugar syrup! Fucking own it! YEAH!! Fill the room, girl! You’re not small, expand! You’re bigggg!

What do you think?

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