Heyyy good morning! I’m pretty chirpy, huh? Well, I wasn’t this way when I woke up. Macam biasa, feeling “sorrow”. But then I had a good stretch and thought to myself, the day hasn’t even started (I was only just awake for 3 minutes?) and I choose to feel “down”??? So I stretched, feeling better. Then I look at myself in the mirror and loved how my hair is and how cute I look, so that made me feel even better.
I took selfies of myself yesterday because I liked how my hair looked like. Hey, love yourself, right?
I had a thought just now in the toilet, what was it aa? Crap. Anyway, maybe the key to look at myself in the mirror more is to have nice hair! Then I started to look at my whole body, and I appreciate it. Apart from the saggy boobs and flabby stomach, I think I look pretty good!
I’m so excited to believe my goal again. The key to believing it is act like you already have it. So that made really eager to write down what I’ve spent. Oh, I need to pay bills. AND THAT DOESN’T BOTHER ME. Why? Because my income has increased. My bills stayed the same, but my income has increase by RM3000. So there’s nothing for me to worry about, because I’ve planned my money & I have a lot. I’m going to put some in stocks, like Din suggested.
Okay, I still can’t remember what my thought was when I was in the shower. Oh! Now I remember!
Before my first therapy session, if I feel down, I find it really hard to get out of that negative mood. Even if I do thought downloads, model, I still feel negative. I know intellectually, that there’s really nothing for me to be negative about, but I can’t get myself out of that feeling. Then I realised today (this morning), that I can easily change that now. I feel down, talked myself out of it, feel freaking good already.
Even when I see the state of my life right now, instead of feeling sad for myself and angry and defeated, I felt compelled to do something. It’s awesome. So there’s not much for me to rant about this morning, I feel pretty good. I feel like I can fucking do anything lol. I’m so proud I woke up earlier just to journal. I kept to my schedule yesterday (most of it, until Fariz woke up).
So today, how would I be if I have RM8000? With my experience now, I’d be more mindful with what I spent. But, in a good way. Not feeling like its not enough. Because I am mindful of my spending, I know it’s more than enough!